Reintroduction

Types With Fingers

Active Member
Hello all, I’ve come back after a very long absence, and thought it would be appropriate to reintroduce myself. When I first joined ALF, I had lost a friend to suicide. It was a very dark time for me — I was so distraught I quit my job and began to seek professional help — and this forum seemed like a good and safe place to explore research and theories on the afterlife.

Well, it’s been several years now, and, long story bearable, my life’s gotten worse. As it turns out, I have a severe form of obssessive-compulsive disorder. Aside from what it’s done to my life (having made it an incessant waking nightmare), it’s significantly affected my thoughts on an afterlife.

I’ve realized that, for me, it doesn’t matter whether some Nobel Prize - winning academician says yay or nay on mediums or NDEs or whatnot. It’s about what I experience. Which, so far, has been nothing. But I persist in my search anyway, and that’s why I’m here.

I’ll do my best to make meaningful contributions, and to be more positive than this post may have made me seem.

So, hello!
 

mac

janitor
I remembered your name but had to look back at what you wrote earlier on ALF. I can now see how much things have changed for you. I hope you find what you found here before.
 

pandora97

Established Member
Hi TWF! I'm a new member here at ALF. I'm afraid I won't be able to say much to help you but there are others on the forum who are knowledgeable and caring and perhaps they can help you along. I'm sorry about your friend. I too lost a friend to suicide.
 

Types With Fingers

Active Member
Hi TWF! I'm a new member here at ALF. I'm afraid I won't be able to say much to help you but there are others on the forum who are knowledgeable and caring and perhaps they can help you along. I'm sorry about your friend. I too lost a friend to suicide.
I’m sorry you experienced that loss. Thank you for your honesty, I think any help is better than none.
 

Amore

New Member
I’ve realized that, for me, it doesn’t matter whether some Nobel Prize - winning academician says yay or nay on mediums or NDEs or whatnot. It’s about what I experience.

Hello TWF! If the sentence I bolded above is what you have realized in these past few difficult years, you have learned a lot! That's a real gold nugget. You might not see it now but I think you are doing just fine, you are facing your challenges and are not giving up. Night is needed to see the stars. The lotus grows in the mud.

Maybe try meditation or yoga to help you relax? Just a thought.

Sending you a hug! :)
 

RobertaGrimes

Administrator
Staff member
Hello all, I’ve come back after a very long absence, and thought it would be appropriate to reintroduce myself. When I first joined ALF, I had lost a friend to suicide. It was a very dark time for me — I was so distraught I quit my job and began to seek professional help — and this forum seemed like a good and safe place to explore research and theories on the afterlife.

Well, it’s been several years now, and, long story bearable, my life’s gotten worse. As it turns out, I have a severe form of obssessive-compulsive disorder. Aside from what it’s done to my life (having made it an incessant waking nightmare), it’s significantly affected my thoughts on an afterlife.

I’ve realized that, for me, it doesn’t matter whether some Nobel Prize - winning academician says yay or nay on mediums or NDEs or whatnot. It’s about what I experience. Which, so far, has been nothing. But I persist in my search anyway, and that’s why I’m here.

I’ll do my best to make meaningful contributions, and to be more positive than this post may have made me seem.

So, hello!

Welcome back, Types With Fingers! Some of your contributions here have been wonderful, and I look forward to reading many more of them!
 

Types With Fingers

Active Member
Well, this is awkward.

Ahem! So, long story short, after I made the above posts, things happened in my life, and I put ALF to the backburner, where it stayed until today. I'm sorry if I worried anyone.

Anyway, I'm sure I have a lot of catching up to do. I can promise you that when I post, I'll do my best to make the content as meaningful as possible.

Hope y'all are doing well,

Types
 

mac

janitor
Three years away? That was a long break.... Of the three who greeted you then there's only me around now and I suggest you shouldn't worry about writing any new contributions.
 

bluebird

Major Contributor
Hello all, I’ve come back after a very long absence, and thought it would be appropriate to reintroduce myself. When I first joined ALF, I had lost a friend to suicide. It was a very dark time for me — I was so distraught I quit my job and began to seek professional help — and this forum seemed like a good and safe place to explore research and theories on the afterlife.

Well, it’s been several years now, and, long story bearable, my life’s gotten worse. As it turns out, I have a severe form of obssessive-compulsive disorder. Aside from what it’s done to my life (having made it an incessant waking nightmare), it’s significantly affected my thoughts on an afterlife.

I’ve realized that, for me, it doesn’t matter whether some Nobel Prize - winning academician says yay or nay on mediums or NDEs or whatnot. It’s about what I experience. Which, so far, has been nothing. But I persist in my search anyway, and that’s why I’m here.

I’ll do my best to make meaningful contributions, and to be more positive than this post may have made me seem.

So, hello!

I really do understand, as it's much the same for me -- not the suicide part, but the rest. I also have OCD, and while it primarily exerts itself in terms of my worrying about health issues, it is expressed in multiple other ways as well. Like you, I find myself unable to believe in an afterlife unless/until my husband actually comes to me to let me know he still exists, he is happy and well, and we will be together again -- although I don't know if I've ever really viewed that as part of my OCD, but your post is making me think that it might be. I don't disbelieve in the existence of an afterlife, in the meantime -- I'm just agnostic on the matter. So please at least know that you are not alone. And welcome back!

Edit: Sorry, I just noticed that your original post in this thread was from 2018! Nonetheless, welcome back now, and what I said above still holds true.
 

Types With Fingers

Active Member
Three years away? That was a long break.... Of the three who greeted you then there's only me around now and I suggest you shouldn't worry about writing any new contributions.
Hi there, mac! I had seriously considered starting a new profile from scratch due to my absence, but since I could still access this one, I felt sticking with this profile was the most efficient thing to do.
 

Types With Fingers

Active Member
I really do understand, as it's much the same for me -- not the suicide part, but the rest. I also have OCD, and while it primarily exerts itself in terms of my worrying about health issues, it is expressed in multiple other ways as well. Like you, I find myself unable to believe in an afterlife unless/until my husband actually comes to me to let me know he still exists, he is happy and well, and we will be together again -- although I don't know if I've ever really viewed that as part of my OCD, but your post is making me think that it might be. I don't disbelieve in the existence of an afterlife, in the meantime -- I'm just agnostic on the matter. So please at least know that you are not alone. And welcome back!

Edit: Sorry, I just noticed that your original post in this thread was from 2018! Nonetheless, welcome back now, and what I said above still holds true.

Hi, bluebird! Please, you have no need to apologize, I really appreciate your post. That sucks, that you have OCD. Should you like, we can chat about it in private conversation, whenever. Feel free not to; I'll leave the door unlocked, so to speak.

Reading my old post, I'm finding it kinda funny that what I wrote those years ago is very much still the same position I hold today (although I could've lightened the tone then).

I think, in regards to personal experience, that we're not actually asking a lot of the Summerlands to send someone to us for comfort and a conversation. We would expect any child lost in a dark forest to cry out for someone to help them; and we would expect any loved one or neighbor who heard their call to respond; and if the child yells for the father and it's the mother who greets them instead, I don't think the child would be ungrateful or angered about it, although they would surely be curious as to the father's location and status.
 

bluebird

Major Contributor
TWF,

Yeah, OCD sucks. In many ways, it essentially prevents peace of mind, because there is always something to worry about -- usually multiple somethings. And if you actually spend time thinking about them, you'll never get done the day-to-day things you need to do, so the only way to get on with regular life stuff is to (try to) ignore or compartmentalize the worries. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. At least, that's how it is for me.

I agree that it is not asking for much, to ask for reassurance (and you phrased your thoughts on that matter very well). The fact that we (largely) don't get it is a big part of why I very much doubt there is any kind of god. And while a reassuring visit from an angel or the like would probably help me feel somewhat better, what I really want is for my husband to visit me (providing that doing so doesn't harm him in any way). If god/source/whatever does exist, I don't trust it -- whereas I do trust my husband. HE is the only one I would believe.
 

Types With Fingers

Active Member
Yeah, I can understand what you mean. Naturally, I have my own opinions on It (god/source/etc.), but I'll save those for other posts in other forums.
 
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