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Our Coming Death...

Discussion in 'General Afterlife Discussions' started by innerperson, Feb 4, 2019.

  1. Monika

    Monika Active Member

    I knew that my Michel will pass away from very beginning of our relationship. I just saw police coming to me, knocking on the door and informing me about his death. I wasvery happy when he finally left army and we moved away to another country. Somehow i thought that it might be military police and i felt i bit relief. But about 6 months or even a bit more before Michel passed I started to feel that fear again. I felt anxious, depressed, scared all together. I started to avoid to go on internet because it was a period where all i saw was articles about death, mostly drowning. It irritated me. I never read such articles. I dont want to see the names of them even. I thought im going crazy and often told to mom on the call that i dont know what is going on but i literally "climb the walls" because of my fears and feelings inside. Some time before all happened i shared my fears with our friend we lived together. I said i cannot see me and Michel old. I just dont see us together in future. Few weeks before Michel died i started conversation with him and same friend about death. I said i want to be cremated and my ashes shall be spread. Michel spoke his own will. The evening before everything happened we were near one lake to let some fish in and i felt so strong sadness for the moment. It was early evening, sun was going down, a bit chilly and windy. Small waves on the lake. The picture almost put me into tears. But Michel took me by hand as we headed back to car and i felt much better. It was last time he took me by hand as he passed away next morning. Police came and knocked our door that evening.
    Because of all of this i know that i knew that he will pass away. Because we are so strongly connected with love in our hearts. We were and are one so for me it is completely common sense that i felt this.
     
    innerperson, SashaS and Bill Z like this.
  2. Bill Z

    Bill Z Established Member

    Monika your words carry such sadness but also wisdom and the love You have for Michel is so beautiful yet tragic. Everything was stripped away from you in an instant. For me it took six years to have everything slowly, slowly, slowly and painfully stripped away but like You from early in our life together I knew my Lover and best friend would not outlive me and I would be there when She drew Her last sweet breath. I had so many visions of standing over the lifeless body of the most magnificent person I have ever know. Like You I cry every day about this. But like You I know we will be together again.
     
    Monika likes this.
  3. Monika

    Monika Active Member

    Thank you Bill♡
     
  4. RobertaGrimes

    RobertaGrimes Administrator

    Dear Monika, thank you for sharing your story with us here. Just as you always knew there would be a brief time when you would be here without him because he was going to go on ahead, so you know now with certainty that his life and yours are eternal, and very soon you will be again in his arms forevermore. There are so many bereaved people who need to know what you know! And the more you tell these beautiful stories, the more you raise all of us a bit more. Thank you, and thanks to your beautiful Michel!
     
  5. Ruby

    Ruby Established Member

    You are very perceptive and intuitive and write so well about these things, Monika. You seem to be very naturally psychic.
    I feel such a dread of remembering the spring of 2016, the immediate "before". Everything before seems perfect to look back on. I find I have to pull myself together just to stop associating certain harmless things with trauma, just because that's where I was, or that's what was happening that spring. It just is loaded with such dread to remember. I can't bear to think of them, and feel just stabbed with the pain when I get reminded. It sounds like that evening before has that effect for you as you remember it so well. It's tough to free the mind from these things.
     
    innerperson and Monika like this.
  6. bluebird

    bluebird Major Contributor

    Same with me, Ruby. There are certain things that I associate with my husband's death, because they occurred around that time, and so I can't have anything to do with them. Even just things that he & I did together, like certain tv shows we watched, particular meals we ate -- I can no longer watch those tv shows or eat those foods.
     
    innerperson likes this.
  7. Monika

    Monika Active Member

    Thank you Roberta for such beautiful message♡ And yes, i agree 100 percent that it is important for others to hear this when their loved one pass away. Actually today I faced the most amazing thing. In the eyes of person who just lost his mother and came completely empty i saw a great sparkle of hope and reasurance. We spoke a lot but the change happened when he asked if i believe that spirit goes on. I said for him that i dont believe, i KNOW that. I was completely amazed of how fiercefully it went out from my mouth. Im not very emotional speaker normally. More listener. It even felt a bit that it was not me who was speaking because it was with such big power. I didnt shout or so, i speak about weight of those words. I could feel that and it was healing for me too. Before he came i was very sad. Such a "crying baby in a victim role" from very morning. As he came i picked myself together. After he left i felt so strong feelings in my heart. I felt so much better. I really had to hear myself saying that and i had to see the power of those words in person who was completely crushed. Im very glad that i was not the only one who felt this way. Before leaving he said how much he need to hear this and that hope and strenght came back to him. It was so special for me to hear that. During lunch i could feel him watching to my side. I didnt look back but i felt he didnt feel empty anymore.
     
    Bill Z and innerperson like this.
  8. innerperson

    innerperson New Member

    Helping others have never failed to not only snap me out of my own misery but also make me feel genuine happiness. :)
     
  9. Storybud68

    Storybud68 Active Member

    71 mac ,sure only a young fella by today's standards
     
  10. mac

    mac Staff Member

    young? Statistically I'm in the last decade of my life, 79 years being the average age of death for males in the UK. I'm writing about death and afterlife issues daily but it's a sobering thought that before too long (statistically) I'm fairly likely to be on the other side of the divide again. ;)

    I've always had an interest in all general news, environmental and science issues but now when I hear about longer-term plans, projects and concerns I'm very much aware that I ain't gonna be around to see the outcomes!
     
    Last edited: Feb 12, 2019

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