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Introducing Myself - Warning: This is long...but I could really use some insight : )

Discussion in 'Member Introductions' started by Ellie, Jan 13, 2012.

  1. First of all, it doesn't matter if you like to buy clothes and do things you enjoy in life that might not seem outwardly spiritual! That has nothing to do with being advanced. I agree with Roberta that you are very advanced and doing things you enjoy just makes you human. You have to enjoy life too, it's not all about suffering. I really commend that way you're handling this.

    Forgiving the man responsible...I would have a rough time with that too. I really would. I know that this is supposed to be the meaning of life and everything but how is it really even possible while you're here on earth? When you and your husband have passed on and your husband will be back to his old self again, forgiving the guy will be a cinch. But how to do it now...I wish I was more qualified to give an answer to this. Just do the best you can, and don't beat yourself up if you have a hard time forgiving this man because you're doing way better than most people would in this situation.
     
  2. LachlanMac

    LachlanMac New Member

    Hey Ellie. That's really an incredible life you have lead so far.

    We've had lots of discussions about memories and such on these forums, and I'll give you my take;

    You can't destroy a memory. Memories exist outside of our head/brain. Brains are the ultimate translator between this world and the next, and when it is damaged, we cannot pull information from the outside in.

    Either way, welcome and good luck with all this!

    Lachlan
     
  3. RobertaGrimes

    RobertaGrimes Administrator

    Dear wonderful, blessed Ellie, thanks for such a thoughtful post! Here are some of my thoughts in response:

    1) A fear of death as extinction seems to be common when we are young. I can recall being terrified of death, even despite my two experiences of light! Now I consider that to have been a blessing, since it was part of what drove me to investigate death and the afterlife. And what I found was that there is so much evidence - and it is so consistent! - that if you study enough of it, you begin to feel foolish about having ever entertained a fear of death. It begins to feel like remembering things that you had absent-mindedly forgotten. We are told that part of the agreement that we enter when we accept a life on earth is a willing amnesia: we agree to forget the truth about reality and everything before this lifetime's birth so we can make the most of our earthly experience. But our amnesia is only by agreement, dear Ellie, and all those eternal memories still are there; a very few people learn to access them, but most of us just have a deja vu feeling as we re-learn what we have briefly forgotten. Study death and the afterlife, dear friend! All the news is good. And you can kill your fears forever.

    2) Forgiving is only for yourself. I can understand how you feel! Some fool took so much from you, and now he doesn't even have the grace to be sorry about it? But forgiveness is not for him, dear Ellie - forgiveness is never for the other person. That is why forgiving him to his face isn't necessary (unless you decide it's necessary). He doesn't really care whether you forgive him. But eventually you will forgive that man because until you forgive him it's as if you are dragging around an ankle-chain with a heavy ball attached. Forgiving makes you free! Not only is it possible, but it is easy when you realize that forgiving frees you. Before long, you won't want to give him any more of your mind-space, and not one minute more of your resentment. Don't worry about it yet, dear friend - for now, just put it on your to-do list. You'll come back to it when you are ready.

    Nothing that you have said makes me think that the two of you are not spiritually advanced beings who are perfectly living the difficult earth-lessons that you planned into this lifetime. Being spiritually advanced does not mean living like ascetics in a mountain tower! But rather, it means loving as only very great beings are able to love. Nothing else ever matters ;-).
     
  4. This is such a great way of putting it! I think forgiving is easier when we realize it's for nobody's sake but our own.
     
  5. Andrew

    Andrew Guest

    Hi all! I agree with you, Annie - it is much easier to forgive someone who "doesn't deserve it", when you realize that you do deserve it!
     
  6. kim

    kim Regular Contributor

    The postings on this thread have all been wonderful, and thank-you Ellie for the opener!
     

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