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Hello out there!

Discussion in 'Member Introductions' started by NovemberFlowers, Nov 17, 2018.

  1. NovemberFlowers

    NovemberFlowers New Member

    Hello everyone!
    I am new here, though I have been doing a lot of reading throughout these forums and felt like I should join and give this a try!

    I have always had an interest in these such things and forever contemplating on the big questions. Like what happens after we die? Where do we go? Who is there?
    Since my father died, a lot of me as changed. The pain and grief I felt has been overwhelming at times, but there are now days that I am able to see that there is a kind of beauty that comes from pain, loss and difficult times. At the same time I am searching. I have never had any dreams about him. Nothing vivid or that stands out. I had once experience that woke me up out of my sleep, which was about a week after he died. After that, I could not feel anything from him. It was like he was just gone and that was that. Maybe I was too sad to see. Over the past year I have felt and noticed more things, though they can be subtle and often I doubt and question myself. I miss him very much and my world has been a much different place without him.

    Thanks for reading! I am glad to be here and wish there were magical words to say to all of you to take away all of the pain and grief that loss can bring. But I know there are not.
  2. Kurt

    Kurt Major Contributor

    Welcome. I'm sure we'll get along.
    NovemberFlowers likes this.
  3. pandora97

    pandora97 Established Member

    Welcome to ALF. I look forward to chatting with you:)
    NovemberFlowers likes this.
  4. mac

    mac Staff Member

    welcome to ALF :)

    You're approaching bereavement and grief in very positive ways and please don't be upset if you don't see - or are not certain about - signs that may be from your father. Although you'd like something definitive I sense you already understand he's not gone forever and although the time before your own passing may appear a long one from the earth perspective it really isn't in the overall scheme.

    I've been at 'this stuff' for well over three decades after the loss of someone very important and I've never had anything I'm certain about either. But he knows that I know so there's no need for him to send me signs. ;):)
    NovemberFlowers likes this.
  5. LovePhool

    LovePhool Guest

    There are two ways to look at this question.

    1) You transition to spirit.
    2) Nothing except your experience in this illusion we call physical reality for that incarnation is over. You actually never left spirit.

    This will depend on what is best for your continued growth. It is a possibility that if you have had a 'bad' life that you will continue with that burden into a lower level of the spirit rrealm. If it better serves you, then you may find yourself in a higher vibratory state more dominated by love.

    Whoever you need.

    You control your experiences as well you should. See #2 above.
    NovemberFlowers likes this.
  6. LovePhool

    LovePhool Guest

    Yes there is and imo that is a very perceptive view.

    Grief is a process, it can be as long or as short as you decide it to be. No one knows you better than you do so take whatever time you want.

    Two comments. 1) Grief, as necessary as it is, has a blocking mechanism for many in their human-spirit communications. Expect that the potentiality for spirit contact to elevate as time wears on. 2) Spirit has lives too! Maybe he's busy! Regardless, spirit will give you what you need, when you need it and, perhaps, the best thing for you is that he stays silent for the time being.

    "And if that brings tears, we strongly urge this, that you let those tears flow and do it as often as you want, for as long as you want. For then, ultimately and eventually, you will release, through the tears, a lot of those energies, a lot of the chemicals that, when they build up in your body, can cause further damage, a lot of the tension, a lot of the stress. And,perhaps, you will allow yourself, rather than asking, "I know I create my own reality, what did I do to create this?" Rather than asking that, you will ask instead, "what can I do with this?"
    NovemberFlowers likes this.
  7. NovemberFlowers

    NovemberFlowers New Member

    Thank you very much! Likewise
  8. poeticblue

    poeticblue member

    Welcome! :)
    NovemberFlowers likes this.
  9. NovemberFlowers

    NovemberFlowers New Member

    Thank you so much for your reply! It was very thoughtful. I am not always positive about it, but have come a long way from where I was at first. I took care of him when he became sick and it was one of the most heart breaking experiences to watch him just fade away and there not be a thing I could do about it.
    I do have days that I just want to talk to him so badly and would give just about anything for some kind of sign. It is a very empty feeling. But at the same time I know there is something to be learned from this. Which can be difficult at times if that makes sense. I am glad to have made progress but there are those days I feel very sad and just want a sign that he is ok. So it kind of goes both ways at times..
  10. NovemberFlowers

    NovemberFlowers New Member

    Thank you for this. It was very well thought out and very helpful. It is very good to see a different perspective on these things. I have been noticing things over this past year, though subtle they seem to come out of nowhere. It has been a difficult year and there are times that seemingly out of nowhere I feel comforted and loved even though nobody is there. Or I will feel like he is right there in the room with me. Like I could turn around and talk to him and it would feel normal if it wasn't for the fact he has died.
    I agree with you about grief having a blocking mechanism. It was not until I started to work through my grief that I was able to feel connected to him once again.

    I like that quote. It is very beautiful. I have been asking myself that very question. What can I do with this? There is always something to learn from every situation I think. We never stop learning.

    Thank you again. You have given me some things to think about.

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