1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Afterlife Forums is an online, interactive community designed to give seekers direct access to prominent researchers, to afterlife literature, and to one another in order to foster both spiritual growth and public interest in life after death.

Had a reading done and not in good shape after

Discussion in 'General Afterlife Discussions' started by GoldDustWoman622, Apr 26, 2018.

  1. GoldDustWoman622

    GoldDustWoman622 New Member

    Mac, you are really right , I am mad at him because I do want him around , I absolutely hate it that he is gone . I was agitated with him that day of the sitting but outwardly calm, well and now too if I am honest . I think in preparation I also inadvertently helped myself get through the shock and denial and onto the anger stage of this . I am glad I posted when I did, it helped me along with the others here not to do anything rash. I have no other living family besides my kids and most of them are in their 30's, 2500 miles away , totally freaked out seeing me like this , and wont talk about it - well and my 53 yr old sister who has to live in a group home for schizophrenic folks ( even she was on the phone telling me to sit down and catch my breath before I had a heart attack ) . Now I am almost ready to ask for some things out of the garbage bag that I miss already . Ridiculous to want to do something out of spite to a spirit I love, it's only going to hurt me . Of course I will stay with you all , I learn something new or learn deeper every time I am on . I like that term sitting instead of reading myself actually .

    Zac , he actually passed away not too far from you in Sonoma and my sister is in the same area, he was buried in Bishop . So I make the trek all over the state it seems .
    Last edited: Apr 28, 2018
  2. Ski

    Ski Active Member

    I answered your last question in your paragraph on this exact thread.

    Next time, it would help if you don't ask me if psychics should offer their services for free, under Golddust's post if you want to keep it on topic. I'm not rude, I'm going to answer your question when you ask,

    Last edited: Apr 29, 2018
  3. mac

    mac Staff Member

    I asked whether we expected them to do it for free - I ought to have made it clear my question was rhetorical... apologies.
  4. jimrich

    jimrich Established Member

    Working with your therapist on your anger may be the best solution. Anger and rage, such as you describe, is often evidence of deeply buried and hidden mental/emotional wounds, often from early childhood, that can surface or be triggered by nearly any stressful event in the present. These buried and hidden traumas or wounds can seem mysterious and inappropriate UNTIL you remember how and when you were wounded in the past - often by our parents or some significant figure BEFORE you even met your now departed husband. The loss of your mate might have triggered old, hidden feelings/memories of a previous, childhood similar trauma or rejection, etc. You'd need to have your therapist help you recall and examine how and when you first experienced this kind of anger and rage (as a child) and who it is truly connected to. Who hurt you? What happened back then?
    Good luck.......... jim
  5. GoldDustWoman622

    GoldDustWoman622 New Member

    Hi Jim ,
    That is what I see her for- Anxiety and now of course severe depression . Ugh as where to start with the other my entire life has just been very rough . Then as an adult , on my own mostly at 17 and things I had to do to make it out there . This was before I met my husband . He was one of the very few bright spots in my life . His life had been as rough if not worse and we were just so happy to find someone that we didn't have to pretend around or watched what we said . We both had tread a really hard road . I have had anger feelings sometimes because he got out and I am still down here slugging it out through life without him . I put myself in therapy 30 years ago ,now it's sort of a maintenance thing more than crisis. I keep reading that this is a part of grief that just cannot be avoided .. although I had a GF this morning say wow you sure moving fast .. uhm no I'm really not .

    After I have thrown my fit , it just dissolves into tears anyway, I look like a ragdoll and have to be put to bed . I think -well I know- I am past the shock and now I have to really deal with it because there IS no bargaining of any kind . I bounce around all the stages except that one . It just happened so fast .
    Amore likes this.
  6. ravensgate

    ravensgate Regular Contributor

    GoldDustWoman6, in my opinion the anger you feel toward your husband is normal, it is part of the grieving process. Not everyone experiences it, but it is far more common than you'd think.
    I see the conflicting, confusing experience you had with your reading as the catalyst for your anger. I believe that sooner or later that anger would have manifested itself.... the reading just happened at "the right time", so to speak. Some people grow terribly angry toward a god who "allowed" such tragedy to occur. You are angry at your husband, perhaps you might one day get angry toward your god.... it varies from person to person.
    As others have suggested, give yourself some time before throwing away your husband's possessions, as you may regret doing so at later date. If I may suggest, go with your anger and don't feel guilty for feeling angry; it may be a step you need to take to facilitate your healing.
  7. Ski

    Ski Active Member

    Amen. You said it perfectly.
    GoldDustWoman622 likes this.
  8. GoldDustWoman622

    GoldDustWoman622 New Member

    I would definitely second that Ravensgate . I hadn't seen your post until now but yes that pretty much hits the nail on the head. It would have manifested it self sooner or later . Absolutely I have been mad with whoever is in charge if anyone from the beginning . A "Christian God" sort of flew out my window years ago. I just couldn't reconcile that with the way the world is , but I do believe strongly in an active spirit world . I am just sort of laying low however long this takes, it is ebbing now but I have managed to catch that very bad flu as well so that has knocked quite a bit of wind from my sails . This is the second time since his death . Like Mac observed I am worn out and I think my immune system is too . I think this is a step up from where I was though, even though it looks bad .
  9. Amore

    Amore Active Member

    Sometimes when a person opens up to strong emotions such as anger or deep sadness and grief the body gets ill afterwards (or during). I don't have a proper explanation, people who work in healing professions can certainly explain it much better than I could. But I know that I have been told many times after an intense Reiki session or deep massage aimed at releasing emotions that this can happen (and it did). The body cleans out as well as the mind and heart.

    From your posts here it sounds to me you got quite an emotional shock during that reading and were 'out of balance' energetically for a while. I'm glad you had people close who were there for you and I hope you still have. Be kind to yourself and take your time. Let the body deal with and overcome this flu, sleep, drink enough, listen to soothing healing music, and try to relax. Your unconscious is dealing with everything you went through the past few weeks and soon you will feel better again. :) For me writing also always helps a lot when I'm in inner turmoil, throwing everything out there.

    You said here a couple of times that you feel (felt?) embarrassed - you certainly don't have to be! I think you are very courageous in the way you deal with those intense feelings and I appreciate your openness and honesty. It's like a breath of fresh air.
    Luizcarlos, Widdershins3, Ski and 2 others like this.
  10. jimrich

    jimrich Established Member

    When I entered therapy (so long ago) to overcome a rotten childhood and intense rage, the whole point was to somehow RESOLVE those old, unresolved feelings and dealing with painful, bottled up anger was at the top of my list. It only took about 2 years to resolve most of my early childhood pain and rage so I don't understand why it's been over 30 years for you to resolve old, bottled up rage. Therapy showed me how to resolve old and even new anger very quickly so, good luck hopefully getting into some more successful form of therapy ASAP.

Share This Page