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Death of a soulmate(spouse) : Single, Suicide or moving on in life?

Discussion in 'Spiritual Growth & Development' started by tobeornotbeQ, Feb 7, 2015.

  1. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    We are all privileged in being allowed to write (within website rules) whatever we wish to and that goes equally for responses to what others write.

    In an earlier posting you said you were giving advice but now you've changed that to saying you are making suggestions and that's what I do when folk come with questions or if they're airing their problems.

    I realise I'm reactive to folk giving advice and that's because I've encountered situations when individuals give 'advice' without their having any competence and/or without due regard to another's personal situation. I'm not suggesting that's the situation in your case, however. I'm simply offering an explanation for the general approach I take.
  2. Monika

    Monika Active Member

    Mac, i agree with you. At least this what i know assure me that even if i kill myself i will meet and be with Michel. He spoke about "dissaster" for us. I did not go deeper into this topic with him but i think i know the answer to myself. We carry there our personality, memories, mind and everything. Probably the only one thing what we miss there is the possibility to create excuses for ourself. If here i can think for myself: " i know, if i kill myself it will hurt my family horribly much, my friends will blame themselve because they didnt see this coming, but this emotional pain is killing me too slow, i miss Michel too much". Maybe after there is no but anymore. No excuse for myself. Michel knows that im very very sensitive about emotions of others. Maybe this would be our personal dissaster because when we would meet i could not turn my face to our love, to grow it and progress with it because i would be overhelmed with sadness of pain what i left below to all i love. Maybe this would last until every single of them would come and i could finally say how sorry i am for the pain i caused. Maybe only then we could continue our way.

    This is my feelings and my oppinion about my own situation. I know nothing about suicide affects in afterlife in general. Just i believe there is not one answer as every suicide helds different storry behind and different reasons. This should resonate different in afterlife too. Probably...
  3. Monika

    Monika Active Member

    Ski, i love nature too! I was born and grew up and spend solid part of my life in a big cities. Im so called "asphalt child". And i can say that it was the easiest and fastest decission for me to make when my husband said lets quit our jobs and travel to live to place we love, then we will never need to wait for holidays to go there. We had 10 months here together. But those 10 months were magical for us And it is still magical. I am so gratefull for Michel that we came here. Every single day i say thank you. Im very happy to be able to drink water just from mountain river, to say hi for moose every morning, meet arctic hare during night walks and most fun is to find some reindeer traces directly near the doors of the place i work.
    We both had this "nature call" and we reached to fullfill our dream.
    But i totally understand that this not what every one likes or feel so good. I can say NONE of our friends from previous places where we lived came to visit us here. Its either too cold (in winter) or too much mosquito (in summer) :)
  4. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    I think you are very knowledgeable about many matters, Monika, even if you're not always consciously aware about what you know. ;) You have given very sound reasons and ideas about why your Michel has said it would be a disaster to end you life to be with him. Your words "We carry there our personality, memories, mind and everything." are exactly right in my view and carry great significance. There is no hiding, no excuses like we make in this world but having said that we will not be judged harshly by others. The harsh judgement will come from ourselves, about ourselves, when it is deserved.....

    I haven't found any clear, definitive guidance about suicide. There are lots of understandable reasons NOT to end one's life but how it impacts us after we have passed over remains unclear to me. I'm sure, though, that personal circumstances come into play and that many ideas about suicide are probably misguided.
  5. Ski


    Hi Mac, I understand....I think you have a different perception of my intentions as well. I'm suggesting or giving advice about nature, amd every day normal living stuff that might help one....whatever works for one might not for another. But asking one to feel their experience here, whatever gives them happiness or an inkling of joy for a few seconds or minutes, Imho, is not leading one astray or going to harm them. I realize if I told them to climb a mountain and sacrifice a child, or stay 48 hours until God speaks to them, Or to fast for 40 days, might cause severe emotional amd psychological distress...and can be dangerous, but that is not comparing oranges to apples in my post. I'm very competent as I understand that reasoning....on your side amd mine. Your suggesting my advice is harmful...I see no harm in every day normal activities, but yes...if I were suggesting, something that could lead them astray, or promising something that could harm them...then I could see how that would warrant an overly overzealous response. At this point, I do not.
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2018
  6. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    My perceptions are often different from those of others....

    As I mentioned earlier, advice is different from opinion.

    Did I say that it would?

    And if you had suggested any such thing then I would have strongly condemned you for such foolishness. You didn't, though, and neither did I....

    I didn't suggest any such thing.

    That was never my suggestion but I return to what I said earlier. One must not assume that personal experience is necessarily guidance for others. Suggestions tailored to the perceived, or declared, needs of another is a better, careful and considered response.

    My observations apply to myself in the same way they're intended to apply to others.
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2018
  7. bluebird

    bluebird Well-Known Member

    While I understand mac's carefulness, I just want to say that I did not find Ski's suggestions to be overbearing or even slightly harmful -- and I am someone who does take umbrage when I perceive someone else attempt to put her/himself forward as an "expert" in the afterlife, dictate to others how they should live/behave, etc. I think Ski's suggestions should be approached in the same way as should all afterlife-related topics -- take on board whatever you find helpful, whatever resonates for you, and leave the rest. ;)
    Ski likes this.
  8. Ski


    Fair enough....have a good day Mac!
    - If I crossed any boundaries with my last suggestion, I sincerely apologize
  9. Ski


    Thank you....and excellent post. That was my intention, and what I was trying to convey, but you said it perfectly, Bluebird.
    bluebird likes this.
  10. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    Thank you for your consideration but you did not cross any boundaries. :)
    Ski likes this.
  11. Ski


    Thank you Mac, I hope you have a good night. Take care
  12. jimrich

    jimrich Active Member

    This is a pretty long thread so I can only offer a few thoughts about "soul mates" and "suicide".
    I have no idea what a soul mate is. I consider my late wife to be my soul mate and also my current fiance so perhaps there are many soul mates over time and place (?). I feel very close to both of these women and can easily imagine all of us co-existing in Heaven as spirit or spirits in that very different realm than here in the earth plane. My fiance does not see it this way so I don't talk about my late wife with her any more than necessary. As for suicide - do whatever feels right! It's your life! In some way, all of us are destined to leave this plane so go whenever and/or however you want to. I'm sticking around to see what might happen next and also to have some more experiences, love, joy and happiness with my current partner. I'm 80, so there's not much left of my current earthly adventure. LOL, next time................
  13. jimrich

    jimrich Active Member

    My late wife, Irene was &still is my soul mate and my current fiance is also my soulmate. They are both very different individuals but we are definitely soulmates!! My late wife is still alive and well in the afterlife but visits less and less - mostly in my dreams. Although I know just how wonderful her word/heaven is I would not kill myself to go there now to be with her again. I try to give all my love and devotion to my current partner.
    Kurt likes this.
  14. Kurt

    Kurt Well-Known Member

    Hopefully you all will be reunited in the afterlife.
  15. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    Do we accept the notion of soul-cells or soul-groups, journeying spiritually with other cell/group members and incarnating a number of times? These lives always associated in varying ways with members of our soul-cell / soul-group. If so perhaps many, most or even all of our relationships are with our eternal spiritual companions, our 'soul mates'?

    And perhaps those we feel as 'special', who we feel are our 'soul-mates', are simply those we are more aware of in that particular incarnate role? Others may also be our spiritual soul-cell companions - 'soul-mates' - but sharing incarnate connections or relationships with us that may not result in them being discerned as such. ;)

    Who knows what unrecognised incarnate relationships we may have with others from our own soul-cell?
    pandora97 and Kurt like this.
  16. Kurt

    Kurt Well-Known Member

    That is very, very... Very true.

    Here's another side ball.... So you need to be physically next to a person for them to count?

    Or can you be in sthe same soul cell as different people that you have a relationship with...

    I.e. - what if everyone active here is part of the same cell? We are all spiritually aware....

    What if most trolls are in the same cell? Most have no motive. (Political or hired ones are obviously different)
  17. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    Physical life isn't the issue.

    Isn't that what I was alluding to? But all that pre-supposes that the soul-cell notion is accepted and if it is there's a good bit more to understand....

    Would anything preclude it?

    What if they're not? What difference does it make to our lives in this world? When we consider spiritual issues we also need to remember we're here to experience and there's no telling what we're here to experience or what 'arrangements' might have been made for it? Be that as a seeker of understanding or someone who seeks simply to frustrate others' efforts.
  18. Kurt

    Kurt Well-Known Member

    What I am alluding to is whether or not it is necessary for people Know each other in person to be in the same cell group.
  19. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    I don't know.
    Kurt likes this.

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