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Death of a soulmate(spouse) : Single, Suicide or moving on in life?

Discussion in 'Spiritual Growth & Development' started by tobeornotbeQ, Feb 7, 2015.

  1. Ski

    Ski New Member

    Aww, many hugs to you as well...you don't have to apologize to me(although that was very sweet of you) I do understand, I have not walked this earth and not been touched by tragedy, pain, ect. My job, nor intention is not to get defensive, or else I would be without faith in my own experiences. My job is to be here, to tell my story, and hopefully comfort those who need it. But, I am not just Sharing my beliefs, Im sharing whats happened to me, Im strong in my conviction, first hand witness to my own accounts. I am here if you need me, to talk, and I have no agenda to push or pull you in any direction, you are your own spirit, soul...light. I see things you won't, but someday...here or in the afterlife, you will know for yourself, Huggs, love and light to you Mrs. Blue*
    bluebird likes this.
  2. Monika

    Monika Active Member

    Ski, somewhere deep inside i agree with you about suicide..Also when i asked Michel what would be if i kill myself his answer was: it would be a disaster for us. I didnt ask more about that. I know that it would not be a solution. And anyway i live with such thoughts every single day. I have created many plans in my head how to do this and to be sure that i wont fail. Thoughts about suicide still comforts me. Very much. But i try to pass day by day with hope that i wont need to stay here very long and with knowledge that there is a reason in everything. But it is not easy to hope for fast death when you are 31. Im 31. I can not imagine myself living 20 more years, or 10, even 5 or only until this summer... I beg all the powers every single day please please let me go and be with my husband forever in our love. Even the understanding that i need to fullfill my life purpose here does not help. I count every day. One day passed - one day im closer to my love. Sometimes i count hours and when its very hard even minutes.
    After Michels death strange things started to happen for me. I know this is wrong thread to speak about that but to end my message i want to say that few days ago i met one sami shaman. It was one more person you confirmed what is happening for me and he said: "people go through this spiritual awakening path for many many years, my own awakening was rather fast, but yours go in speed of light. Because you have not much time left. And you know that". I said i know. I knew from when i was child that i will die young. I didnt like this, i pushed it away. But now this is what gives me hope.
    Ski likes this.
  3. Ski

    Ski New Member


    I often go through life with the same feelings. People often don't open up about their depression and grief, unless I open that door when Imsee someone struggling. I don't always know what to say, but I know the grief and pain....we are not alone in our feelings. So many people, I've come across...present a happy, carefree, upbeat attitude...some of the happiest, strongest people I have met, committed suicide. Shocking because, nobody saw it coming. It was hard not to come up with theories of them being murdered by someone else, because they are the last people anyone would see committing suicide.

    I have such compassion, love, amd understanding because there was a long period in my life, where I not only thought about...I unconsciously almost did it, I wrote about my NDE on here....I do take responsibility for being wreckless with my life amd causing it.

    I was shown after that, that I had caused my death in two other lives...one of them induced suicide, the other was similar to what I did in this life. ( I also had to take spiritual classes on the other side , men in robes, the cathedral buildings, ect...they can make one take spiritual classes during your sleep if you a repeat suicide) I will make a post, I have many drawings of what I seen. Often those who commit suicide here, have done it in other lives. Like myself.

    Do you know why so many are depressed, and commit suicide?
    In our soul, we know we aren't worthless, we know we are great, strong, graced, loved, beautiful, precious, eternal, beings...but they don't show us that here. Many of us dont get treated very good here.. in fact we get treated just the opposite, over a long period of time. It wears a person down, especially if it's done at an early age, and by abuse. That's why when we are dragged down, attacked, bullied, slandered, ect....that we become defensive. Yes, it's to protect our feelings, but it's also because deep down...it's not the truth, and that's why we fight back. We may not consciously know our instincts of why we fight back....and science will call it self preservation, but even a person who feels they have no self worth, and is suicidal...will fight back.

    If we knew inside, we were truly worthless, unloved, and this was it...we wouldn't care. We would become conditioned to be cold, hardened, unnerved, psychopaths. While we do have people like that, and while many of us have become hardened with different aspects of narcissi , we have come a long way...we have learned a lot, and it's socially open...and with technology, it is blaring obvious we still have more to learn. Racism, hate, prejudice, ect, ect.

    We are in a phase, and open wounds are exposed. If you have ever been seriously hurt, you know having open wounds can be life threatening. But you also know, in order to heal, you have to disinfect, and expose the wound to air. You a
    So know, that there will scars.

    Our spirits are the same way.

    Once we get the other side, those wounds are shown, and healed through high frequencies of energy, amd light. Some call it high levels of love to be more specific. What is looked at, is the amount of suffering, and how long a soul was able to hold on, and how they fought through it...just like you.

    When you get to the other side, the frequency is so high, that you won't even remember what happened here...but you will be shown.

    When I had my NDE, I didn't even make it into the light...and the trauma here was already wiped away. You know if you have slept really well, how it heals the body on a lower level...take that and times it by a trillion, amd that's what being in spirit is like. Our time here is so small compared to eternity. Time there is different, too...because the vibrations are so high, time flies.....because the vibrations here are so low, time drags on. Time is measured by frequency, and not a clock.

    We are all in this boat together here. We unconsciously pick up on others energy, pain and grief, happy and sad....it's in the atmosphere, but the earth (trees, plants, ect) combat and cleanse the energy, amd the weather patterns are a direct mirror of that energy, it also serves to help us on an energetic and spiritual frequency. Example, rain and thunderstorms help us to confront sad aspects to our lives that we carry around, and are not facing head on.

    It is our society, and the way we have been raised....that we have lost or buried our spiritual roots here....this earth was made to help us on our journey, through its own healing frequencies, but we have forgotten that...and stopped eating straight from the earth, we have traded outside activities for inside technology, amd do not spend enough time in nature to let it heal us.

    I'm sorry, I'm going on and on...I will leave it at this right now. I hope you have a wonderful Easter, Monika..
    SashaS and Monika like this.
  4. Maria

    Maria Member

    Ski, I found reading your views on suicide fascinating as you have so much vision and empathy. I often think that those who are highly sensitive and affected by the nastiness of this world, come from a different spiritual realm; one that was more gentle and kind. I also agree with your opinion that committing suicide could result in being deprived of seeing your loved one in the afterlife. Another penalty might be reincarnating and having to endure the same misery again. Like Monika does, at the end of every day I count it as another step closer to being reunited with Peter, and my philosophy is that as no one is promised tomorrow, our demise may be sooner than we imagine.
    Monika and Ski like this.
  5. Ski

    Ski New Member

    Thank you Maria. That means a lot, I do have a lot of empathy for others passing through this world, nobody gets out unscathed...and nobody should be punished, or shunned for being themself and going through hard times. People have closed themselves off, fear of being negative, or ashamed because they are going through trials...after all, we all do. I think we have forgotten who we are, and our spiritual nature. We have lost touch, and lost our knowledge of this earth's help...we did evolve physically from here. I'm going camping this weekend...I encourage others to spend a lengthy time out in nature...it is greatly healing. Take a walk, hike, camp, fish, build a bonfire, or make a garden, ect. We were meant to be pushed in the sunlight, and among trees, plants, flowers, animals, water, or under the stars.

    I do not personally believe if one commits suicide, they won't be reunited with their loved ones in the afterlife, that would be punishment, and in the higher energetic realms of vibration, punishment is not apart of the energy. I should clarify, that I do believe in reincarnation...and I mean in life, given the motive and intention. If one creates a codependency on others, they will have to eventually stand on their own...and that is for spiritual growing.

    We are given family, friends, neighbors and others for companionship, guidance, inspiration, and love....but we should not commit suicide in fear, or loneliness, we were made to overcome codependency, and negativity. Often when one is suicidal, they aren't making correct choices to overcome their situation...they aren't moving forward amd learning to really stand on their own, they are the lost, amd living in the darkness....when there is light, everyday we wake up to the sun shining...the sun never gives up, you can count on it, you know it's there. We are suppose to love simple, amd free....and create a strong character of resilience, love, forgiveness, independence, and faith. That's what spiritual growing is all about. Opening up, letting the light in, even if that means going outside amd sitting in the sun.

    Living is also taking pride in small things, a garden, your yard, children, cooking, and all the other small things we do everyday, not go through the motions, but actually opening up and experiencing what we are doing. It's the small things that make up a full day, it's the small things that really count.

    Happy Easter, Maria
  6. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    We should be wary of believing we know what's best for others simply because it's what we respond positively to. As incarnates we will not all have similar levels of spiritual progression and what's right for one isn't necessarily right for another.

    As I understand matters, punishment is never part of life in the etheric world, be they 'lower' or 'higher' vibrational realms. But I do agree that those who end their own lives will not be prevented from later meeting up with their loved ones. And if the principle of soul-cells is as some believe, we always accompany one another on our spiritual odyssey from, and back to, the source.

    I also subscribe to the notion of multiple lives but I suspect we know little about how reincarnation truly works.


    Would it were so simple.....

    As I remarked earlier, we should be wary of believing we know what's best for others simply because it's what we respond positively to.
  7. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    That's not what I've learned. There are no such 'penalties' or such punishment. But who knows what one might decide to be the 'right way' to resume spiritual progress after such a desperately sad, apparently premature end to an incarnation? One might choose - with the counsel and support of others - a new life intended to address perceived shortcomings in the previous life. Not being deprived by anyone of seeing one's loved ones but effectively delayed?
    Monika likes this.
  8. Ski

    Ski New Member

    Im just giving advice, but you are entitled to your opinion. People have free will, they can do as they wish...I believe nature is healing, amd so I encourage others to try it out. I'm not making anybody do anything.

    Thanks for the reply.
  9. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    Of course folk can do what they wish but advice is best tailored - in my opinion - to the one needing it. Advice is fine when you know what someone is seeking and when you've found that advice has worked well in the past.

    Opinions and beliefs are somewhat different and may be less helpful than one might think. I have opinions on many issues but in respect of spiritual ones I'm most likely to follow the guidance offered by teachers and guides.
  10. Ski

    Ski New Member

    I see, I'm just throwing simple suggestions out there....not really guiding anyone in specific or tailoring a certain person. The advice or suggestion is every day stuff, that most people do. It's not extreme, or pushy, or leading others astray.

    Planting, cooking, getting in the sun, or being out in nature is normal every day activities. It wasn't meant to lead or command anyone to take a certain spiritual course...and I did not reference that it was the best spiritual cure. I'm not sure you quite understood that, it's every day living earthy stuff...that most people do anyways.

    It wasn't meant to be compared to the level of spiritual guidance of a shaman or teacher.

    No herbs, chants, prayers, Jesus, diety, special baths, ect.......just normal every day simple things is what I wrote about. It's a spiritual forum, we are allowed to write and I did not address a specific person to my suggestions. But thanks.
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2018
  11. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    We are all privileged in being allowed to write (within website rules) whatever we wish to and that goes equally for responses to what others write.

    In an earlier posting you said you were giving advice but now you've changed that to saying you are making suggestions and that's what I do when folk come with questions or if they're airing their problems.

    I realise I'm reactive to folk giving advice and that's because I've encountered situations when individuals give 'advice' without their having any competence and/or without due regard to another's personal situation. I'm not suggesting that's the situation in your case, however. I'm simply offering an explanation for the general approach I take.
  12. Monika

    Monika Active Member

    Mac, i agree with you. At least this what i know assure me that even if i kill myself i will meet and be with Michel. He spoke about "dissaster" for us. I did not go deeper into this topic with him but i think i know the answer to myself. We carry there our personality, memories, mind and everything. Probably the only one thing what we miss there is the possibility to create excuses for ourself. If here i can think for myself: " i know, if i kill myself it will hurt my family horribly much, my friends will blame themselve because they didnt see this coming, but this emotional pain is killing me too slow, i miss Michel too much". Maybe after there is no but anymore. No excuse for myself. Michel knows that im very very sensitive about emotions of others. Maybe this would be our personal dissaster because when we would meet i could not turn my face to our love, to grow it and progress with it because i would be overhelmed with sadness of pain what i left below to all i love. Maybe this would last until every single of them would come and i could finally say how sorry i am for the pain i caused. Maybe only then we could continue our way.

    This is my feelings and my oppinion about my own situation. I know nothing about suicide affects in afterlife in general. Just i believe there is not one answer as every suicide helds different storry behind and different reasons. This should resonate different in afterlife too. Probably...
  13. Monika

    Monika Active Member

    Ski, i love nature too! I was born and grew up and spend solid part of my life in a big cities. Im so called "asphalt child". And i can say that it was the easiest and fastest decission for me to make when my husband said lets quit our jobs and travel to live to place we love, then we will never need to wait for holidays to go there. We had 10 months here together. But those 10 months were magical for us And it is still magical. I am so gratefull for Michel that we came here. Every single day i say thank you. Im very happy to be able to drink water just from mountain river, to say hi for moose every morning, meet arctic hare during night walks and most fun is to find some reindeer traces directly near the doors of the place i work.
    We both had this "nature call" and we reached to fullfill our dream.
    But i totally understand that this not what every one likes or feel so good. I can say NONE of our friends from previous places where we lived came to visit us here. Its either too cold (in winter) or too much mosquito (in summer) :)
  14. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    I think you are very knowledgeable about many matters, Monika, even if you're not always consciously aware about what you know. ;) You have given very sound reasons and ideas about why your Michel has said it would be a disaster to end you life to be with him. Your words "We carry there our personality, memories, mind and everything." are exactly right in my view and carry great significance. There is no hiding, no excuses like we make in this world but having said that we will not be judged harshly by others. The harsh judgement will come from ourselves, about ourselves, when it is deserved.....

    I haven't found any clear, definitive guidance about suicide. There are lots of understandable reasons NOT to end one's life but how it impacts us after we have passed over remains unclear to me. I'm sure, though, that personal circumstances come into play and that many ideas about suicide are probably misguided.
  15. Ski

    Ski New Member

    Hi Mac, I understand....I think you have a different perception of my intentions as well. I'm suggesting or giving advice about nature, amd every day normal living stuff that might help one....whatever works for one might not for another. But asking one to feel their experience here, whatever gives them happiness or an inkling of joy for a few seconds or minutes, Imho, is not leading one astray or going to harm them. I realize if I told them to climb a mountain and sacrifice a child, or stay 48 hours until God speaks to them, Or to fast for 40 days, might cause severe emotional amd psychological distress...and can be dangerous, but that is not comparing oranges to apples in my post. I'm very competent as I understand that reasoning....on your side amd mine. Your suggesting my advice is harmful...I see no harm in every day normal activities, but yes...if I were suggesting, something that could lead them astray, or promising something that could harm them...then I could see how that would warrant an overly overzealous response. At this point, I do not.
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2018
  16. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    My perceptions are often different from those of others....

    As I mentioned earlier, advice is different from opinion.

    Did I say that it would?

    And if you had suggested any such thing then I would have strongly condemned you for such foolishness. You didn't, though, and neither did I....

    I didn't suggest any such thing.

    That was never my suggestion but I return to what I said earlier. One must not assume that personal experience is necessarily guidance for others. Suggestions tailored to the perceived, or declared, needs of another is a better, careful and considered response.

    My observations apply to myself in the same way they're intended to apply to others.
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2018
  17. bluebird

    bluebird Well-Known Member

    While I understand mac's carefulness, I just want to say that I did not find Ski's suggestions to be overbearing or even slightly harmful -- and I am someone who does take umbrage when I perceive someone else attempt to put her/himself forward as an "expert" in the afterlife, dictate to others how they should live/behave, etc. I think Ski's suggestions should be approached in the same way as should all afterlife-related topics -- take on board whatever you find helpful, whatever resonates for you, and leave the rest. ;)
    Ski likes this.
  18. Ski

    Ski New Member

    Fair enough....have a good day Mac!
    - If I crossed any boundaries with my last suggestion, I sincerely apologize
  19. Ski

    Ski New Member

    Thank you....and excellent post. That was my intention, and what I was trying to convey, but you said it perfectly, Bluebird.
    bluebird likes this.
  20. mac

    mac senior member Staff Member

    Thank you for your consideration but you did not cross any boundaries. :)
    Ski likes this.
  21. Ski

    Ski New Member

    Thank you Mac, I hope you have a good night. Take care
  22. jimrich

    jimrich Active Member

    This is a pretty long thread so I can only offer a few thoughts about "soul mates" and "suicide".
    I have no idea what a soul mate is. I consider my late wife to be my soul mate and also my current fiance so perhaps there are many soul mates over time and place (?). I feel very close to both of these women and can easily imagine all of us co-existing in Heaven as spirit or spirits in that very different realm than here in the earth plane. My fiance does not see it this way so I don't talk about my late wife with her any more than necessary. As for suicide - do whatever feels right! It's your life! In some way, all of us are destined to leave this plane so go whenever and/or however you want to. I'm sticking around to see what might happen next and also to have some more experiences, love, joy and happiness with my current partner. I'm 80, so there's not much left of my current earthly adventure. LOL, next time................

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