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Aloha, NDE question from a new member

Discussion in 'NDE The near-death-experience forum' started by MauiNui, Feb 6, 2018.

  1. MauiNui

    MauiNui New Member

    I just found this site and am looking forward to learning and sharing with the community. My NDE experience changed my life. As a former atheist, it was an undeniably spiritual awakening. I didn't experience going in but did experience being there, and the quantum awareness that exists there, and the experience of coming back out. The nature of time was a big aspect of my 'education'. I could go on for pages, but I'll keep it reasonably brief for now.

    I've read quite a few experiences about going in but I'm curious if others have experienced their return journey and what that was like, and also whether time was a prominent part of that lesson?

    Enjoying catching up on the posts.

    Much Aloha
     
  2. mac

    mac long-term contributor Staff Member

    welcome to ALF - You should have something in common with a number of our members. :)
     
  3. ravensgate

    ravensgate Member

    If you feel comfortable sharing your NDE experience, please do.
    Welcome to ALF!
     
    bluebird likes this.
  4. pandora97

    pandora97 New Member

    Welcome! I'm a new member also and like ravensgate, I wouldn't mind hearing about your experience if you would care to share it with us.:)
     
  5. bluebird

    bluebird Well-Known Member

    Seconded. ;)

    Sorry, thirded (I just noticed pandora's post, lol).
     
  6. MauiNui

    MauiNui New Member

    Ok. let me know if there is another place to post this NDE.

    It's hard to make this any more brief...

    The Setup:

    The only thing I remember about that day was making one simple decision. I had surfed a little too long that morning and now there wasn’t time to double back and take my surfboard home. I decided to put it inside my car instead of setting it on the roof; so it would be safe in the parking lot at work. That’s it. The rest of that day and the previous week are a blank.

    At lunch, I told my office mate that I was headed to an optometrist appointment. I was driving to that appointment when a dislodged blood clot stuck in my left coronary artery and stopped my heart at the age of 51.

    With incredible luck (or whatever one might conclude), I happened to be passing through the intersection that sits directly in front of the hospital. First responders got there quickly and started reviving me. It took five tries with the paddles to get me going. I’d been clinically dead for about 9 minutes. Other than a few random errands. I almost never pass near that hospital. That timing is what I think about more than anything.

    Eight days later I came out of an induced coma to my mother’s voice asking me to squeeze her hand. (i’d always thought that was a cliche) Considering what I was being told, I felt surprisingly good. The EMTs had gone to town on my ribs but who’s complaining. My family and medical staff were elated. I expected it from my family, but the reaction of the nurses and doctors was remarkable.

    My chances of survival had been minimal. My chances of coming back without brain damage: nearly zero. The next day one of the doctors and a nurse came to my room. They asked if they could take a picture with me. “You’re our miracle patient.” I started to realize that my survival had been a remarkable medical accomplishment. As a lay there, I represented the biggest win of their careers. 2 outs, bottom of the ninth… This was getting weird.

    Many months later my cousin, an ER nurse asked me for a photo to share with the rest of the staff. She said that it would be really rewarding for them to see me happy, out living in the world. They lose so many that a story like mine is a needed boost. I think about that and that I sort of owe them a life well-lived.

    The Experience:

    It didn’t occur to me to even wonder about an NDE. I was an avowed agnostic and believed that they were simply the product of a last-second DMT trip. When a friend asked what it was like to be dead my memory of it was right there. I was a ball of fuzzy light, but that ball was also everything. I was viewing the ball externally while also being inside the ball. I had transcended time and space and achieved a kind of quantum awareness.

    Once you can be anywhere, anytime and know the state of all information you stop asking questions, you cease to have needs, inner conflicts or even emotions. Its a pure, blissful shared awareness. The space I was in felt like an ocean of thick black velvet of contentedness. Everything is and always will be just fine. There’s absolutely nothing we can do here that alters that .

    Asked to define the feeling in one word: With. You are with everything, there is no without. You are closer to everyone than you could ever be while alive. As pure spirit you share in everything and are ever-present. I think that’s the biggest misconception/fear that I had; that I would be leaving everything and everyone I’d ever know behind and I’d be alone somehow. It’s the exact opposite.

    I didn’t have any sort of arrival experience. Maybe it happened and I don’t remember, like the rest of that day. I can’t say.

    There was an experience of coming back. I didn’t have a conflict about whether to return or not. I was determined but not concerned or stressed. A foregone conclusion that it would happen. It was time to get back.

    I remember collecting myself, like a storm forming itself from chaos into shape. Once collected I took a metaphorical deep breath and stepped back into time/space. Like pushing a button that starts a carnival ride. I zoomed down on earth from all directions at once. I could see it as a human would, but also as a world of energy fields. I could see humanity from a different perspective as I transitioned from a state with quantum knowledge to my old limited human awareness. I could see that we live in a dream state dominated by our emotional level of awareness.

    As I finished zooming down. I seated myself back in my body, behind my eyes. I could feel the exact orientation of the bed, the hospital, and every atom on the planet. I was ready to go. I don’t know how long it was after I came back before I woke up, could have days or milliseconds.

    I woke up to joy. The staff were hugging each other and it was a great day to be alive. My first conscious thought was that I had to make distinctions, something I had not been doing. I had an impulse to get very close and intimate with everyone and had to remind myself not to do that.

    The Dreams:

    The first two nights I spent in my own bed I had hyper-real shamanistic dreams about time. Theres’ a ton involved but the short version is that time is indeed a flat circle and that we can transcend time and visit multiple moments in time with our consciousness. The second night the dream was about how time was ‘generated’ and a shaman showed me the sentient energy fields that swirl above and below the earth. I woke up from the second dream as if too much information had been stuffed in to my brain. My first waking thought was “I understand time” and then the details started melting away.

    These dreams weren't like normal dreams. There was a completely different quality to them. Very very clear.

    That experience has led me to seek more understanding of earth-spirit based spirituality. I believe our only real mission here is express ourselves and to mix and interact with other spirits here. Do the dance.

    Since then I’ve seen bit and pieces of references to time that are startlingly familiar. The movie of Arrival completely freaked me out, it was almost too on-target in a couple specific ways. (I’d like to meet that writer).

    The Takeaway:

    I don’t fear death anymore. I’ve found myself out in dangerous surf and asked myself objectively “what are you doing?!?!, you need to paddle in.” And yet, I stay calm and stay out. Not in some heroic fashion, just unaffected. The old anxiety is simply absent.

    I can’t express how profound a gift that is -in many, many facets of life. I didn’t seek out any other NDE stories. I felt contented and whole. After 18 months of randomly sharing my experience with friends and friends of friends that were experiencing fear and grief, I started to see the value for others in sharing my story. I’ve just recently started reading other accounts and I’m amazed at the similarities, given how abstract and paradoxical this stuff is. This happened June 2016.
     
  7. bluebird

    bluebird Well-Known Member

    Thank you for sharing your experience, MauiNui.
     
  8. pandora97

    pandora97 New Member

    Yes, thank you very much.
     
  9. ravensgate

    ravensgate Member

    Thank you for sharing, MauiNui.
    I do not know if you have access to it, but do you happen to know the medications used?
    Based on what you shared, it appears you had an occlusion of your LAD. You said they used the paddles, must have been in a VT rhythm, probably not asystole.
    Did the medical team check for other blockages of your coronary arteries? Did you undergo any type of surgical procedure (angioplasty, for example)?
    Were you placed on mechanical ventilation, and if so, what type of sedation (if any) did you receive? (Diprivan is often used).
    Have your religious beliefs and beliefs about the survival of consciousness changed because of the experience? Have your "life priorities" changed in any way?
    My apologies for asking so many questions. This is one topic I am very interested in and have researched for so many years; hope you'll understand :) Thank you.
     
  10. mac

    mac long-term contributor Staff Member

    That was a great and uplifting account, well written and well presented..... :) I found it interesting in many ways but particularly that you had no reluctance to return and had an active involvement. Your recall of at least some of the events is amazingly sharp and clear. A different way - and a rather dramatic one! - to learn about the stuff we ordinary folk take much longer to understand and to understand some things some of us may never properly grasp. ;)

    All of it was intriguing but I particularly liked your sentence "My first waking thought was “I understand time” and then the details started melting away." In connection with other, related matters I've found myself in a similar situation. A "Oh I get it now." moment whose details quickly fade as wakefulness returns.
     
  11. MauiNui

    MauiNui New Member

    @mac: Thanks so much. Yes, no reluctance to return or even a consideration. I've read many accounts where there's a struggle to decide, but I can't reconcile that something like inner conflict could exist in that state of awareness. (Maybe people get that on the journey in, which I missed entirely). Much of my experience since has been about reminding myself to be somewhat scientific and separate real experience from speculation.

    @ravensgate: I'm a little embarrassed to say I don't know some of the medical details. Strangely, I'm a bit incurious about that :p Things I was told:

    My cardiologist pointed out where the blockage was, very close to where the artery meets the heart. They put a stent in there through my crotch. I was on a ventilator. In terms of sedation, don't know the specifics, but I do know that they put me into a hypothermic coma (eight days at 92 degrees). When I had my first stress test (couple weeks later I think, fuzzy times) they did an ultrasound on my heart and found no scarring. They said that was unusual and wouldn't have thought anything had happened. The doctor said I survived because my heart was in good condition. "You have a good pump!", he said.

    [edit: I had a couple seizures after they revived me and got me to the ER, I tend to forget mentioning that for some reason]

    I have this overall sense that I somehow got off scot-free (except for getting absolutely hammered financially, I'll spare you guys that rant).

    In terms of religion (no offense to anyone, just gonna be honest):

    I'm even further away from traditional religion. I see the notion of a deity as a projection of human-level awareness, thoughts and desires (revenge, justice, etc...), I feel drawn closer to earth-based spirituality. When I re-entered earth. I recognized that the earth is sentient as are many fields of energy in and around it. I'm drawn to nature even more and have a desire to connect with other animals somehow. In terms of humans, I'm much more aware that many people are held hostage by their egos and the anxiety of not really living life. I can sense it physically like an electric field. Its also clear that a tremendous amount of information in our brains is straight-up erroneous. We've got a lot of unlearning to do before we can raise our level of awareness from emotional/intellectual to spirit.

    Maybe the biggest personal change other than losing fear is that I have almost zero tolerance for dishonesty and greed now. Though I've never been violent in the least, I have to resist the urge to be confrontational now. Given that I work in tech/marketing, I'm basically unemployable :) I've also noticed that while surfing, I'm much more prone to call someone out for being obnoxious - instead of staying out of it, which has been my standard MO. My overall willingness to let certain things slide has nearly evaporated. Didn't expect that.

    I got a lot better at online poker by reading anxiety and recognizing number patterns;

    [edit: I also get random psychic flashes of things like a guy about to hit a home run. So funny to see my girlfriend freak out. I can't control it.]

    Mahalo for your questions. I've found that only certain people are truly interested in this stuff.
     
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2018
  12. kim marine

    kim marine Active Member

    MauiNui, I had an NDE 34ears ago when I was 18.
    I felt this way also. I was so confident of myself when I was alive in the spiritual realm because my guides always assisted me, and I was conscious of a life that was beyond any ordinary dream that occurred in the physical body. Certain times came when I was "left unattended" so that I would wake up from the coma to become conscious of life on this earth once again. During the NDE I viewed many pictures of life in a quantum-like way. They were sailing around all over the place! Now that I am back on the earth I am conscious of those same general pictures, but they have slowed down to earth speed.
     
    Last edited: Feb 8, 2018
  13. MauiNui

    MauiNui New Member

    It's really interesting that you transitioned back and forth and that the guides played a role. I've read about others having that same experience with guides. Don't know if I missed that or if my dreams afterwards were a memory of that. I try not to speculate and make a mess it.

    I'm a little envious that you had your NDE experience so soon. Has it helped you with certain things in this world?
     
  14. kim marine

    kim marine Active Member

    I can say it did help me, but at first I didn't understand why I kept experiencing so many things in my life that were strangely familiar. In a way it was enjoyably eerie. It seemed as though I was reading a Stephen King book, and I was the main character! However, the pictures that I saw in the spiritual realm need to be edited, because it doesn't seem to be the kind of life this world needs to witness now. That is why I returned; to edit the pictures of my story! I feel that is how we grow spiritually to become more like Christ, or the ever flowing vibe of life, so that this world can say bye-bye to all the hatred and destructive ways that are part of humanity now. We all may need to edit the pictures that are rolling in our eternal minds.
     
    Last edited: Feb 8, 2018

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