Has anyone here actually seen a loved one after death?
Hello. I am new to this site, brought here by my extreme grief. My husband and I were together for nearly 13 years, married for only one week when he died of a completely unexpected heart attack at age 40. I cannot begin to describe to you the depth of my grief; it is all-encompassing. I have no desire or will to live, without him, and I am very angry at God, if there is one (I am agnostic) for taking my love from me.
I am angry because he and I were not allowed to live out our lives together, as we should have. To buy a house, to have kids, to grow old together. Nothing will ever change how I feel about that. More devastating and important, however, is the idea/possibility of my soulmate no longer existing. I NEED to know that he still exists, that he is still himself (as opposed to just some amorphous part of a larger spiritual whole), that he is happy & ok, and that he & I will be together again.
Quite honestly, I really want to kill myself, because life is unbearable without my love here with me. I won't, partly because I promised my family I wouldn't and partly because I am not sure if I would end up where he is, assuming there is any sort of afterlife. Because I am agnostic (as was my husband), I don't know if there is a God or an afterlife or anything.
I have begged and pleaded and prayed for my love to appear to me, to let me know himself that he is ok and that we will be together again. I truly think that his appearance would be the only thing that would comfort me, beyond all doubt. I can only believe him. I have seen other things that may be "signs" from him, and I am very grateful for them, but I cannot 100% believe that they are proof of his continued existence and an afterlife, because I so much WANT and NEED him to still exist that I cannot believe or trust my own perceptions, in case they are just wishful thinking on my part.
So somehow I keep trying to have other people's experiences help convince me. Which mostly they don't, but nonetheless I would very much like to hear any stories any of you have of having actually SEEN your loved ones who have died, and perhaps talked with them, etc. Not stories of "I heard his favorite song on the radio just as I was thinking about him", or "I keep finding pennies out of nowhere, with her birth year on them", but actual visual meetings. Since that is what I hope and pray for, for me and my love.
Thank you for reading.
Last edited by bluebird; 01-04-2013 at 05:57 PM.
Hi! welcome! Be Assured that your husband lives on I will recommend you this free .pdf book wich can be read on the computer, it proves the life after death in scientific way ,it includes many Nobel Prize winners and Genius researchs, this book includes comunications from the other side where they tell us they are in a beatiful place beyond words with a healthy looking young body and everybody are very happy to be there..
This book lifted me from a depression I had giving me hope with irrefutable evidence that this life its only a brief passage and that we live on, heres the link
In regard the other question you raised...I had a very close friend whos mom passed away a year ago approx... she has always been a woman who liked to have her house very clean ...months after she passed away.. a friend of the family reunited in their house and asked for their mom,they said,, havent you know that she died 6 months ago? the guy face turned white and he almost passed out, he then proceeded to tell them that a few days ago he passed by the house and met with their mom outside who was sweeping leaves and he said:
hi, how are you doing?
and she responded, well thanks!
what are you doing?
-here cleaning the house, if i dont do it nobody does it
well, thats fine..
and they exchanged a few more words and then he leaved..
My friend has also told me that more than one person have have seen her mom shadow or silhouette around the house..I have been present when strange things happen there like the water faucet opening by itself when we were speaking about her, they watched the blender turning it on by itself also and a few more things...
Thank you for responding, and for relaying the stories about your friend's deceased mother. Thanks also for the link to the pdf book; I have saved it and will read it another time.
I wish I could "be assured" that my husband lives on. It is incomprehensible to me that he would not, but at the same time it is so desperately important to me that he does and so I wish I could know for sure.
I am so sorry for your loss. I know very well that feeling of desperately wanting and needing a loved one to still exist after death. I went through great lengths recently to prove that someone I cared about lived on. Just the thought of him being permanently gone forever left a scared, nauseated feeling inside of me. I just couldn't bear the thought of him no longer existing.
To answer your main question, "no." I have never actually "seen" a deceased loved one in the traditional sense. I think these experiences are quite rare. But that doesn't mean they don't happen sometimes or that your loved one doesn't live on. From what I've read, it is very difficult and takes a great deal of energy for the deceased to appear in physical form. When you think about this, it makes sense. How is it possible for something that lacks physical form and characteristics to appear physical? For comparison, that would be like asking the wind to appear as a tree. But just because we can't see something, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. We don't doubt the existence of air or love, although we can't actually see either.
I know it's hard to believe in something you can't prove concretely; I've struggled with the same questions myself. But what I can tell you is to keep asking your questions and keep an open mind as to how the answers will appear. What helped me is to talk aloud to the person who passed and actually ask him questions. I was actually surprised by the answers I received because they came in ways I could not have imagined. One of my most amazing experiences was when I was trying to prove he could actually hear me and send me signs and that I wasn't just imagining it all. I asked him to send me a pink rose. I saw a few things that could have been my sign, but dismissed them and challenged him to do better. Then one day I was at a park and was about to sit down on a bench when I noticed something under my seat -- it was a pink fabric rose! No, I didn't see him standing there, but the joy and love I felt at that moment was amazing.
I sincerely hope that you have a moment like this, one where you will no longer need to see your husband to know he is still around, that he is with you and trying to reach out to you -- even if you can't physically see him.
Hi bluebird, I lost my boyfriend of 6 years last year. I was devestated, heartbroken, and wanted to kill myself, just like you. I have since had many signs. Last night I went out to dinner with his family, which my boyfriend would have loved. I think he wants us to be there for each other through his death, and bond, if you will. Anyway, I haven't had many signs lately, but this morning I finally got some. Over the past year I have seen 111 or 1111 everywhere - time, GPS systems, exercise machines, license plates, and all at strange moments. Even his death happened on 12/11/11. As I was driving to school my GPS system wouldn't stop falling down. It was driving me insane, because this doesn't happen EVER! When I kept trying to get it to stay up, I would notice that I had 1.1 miles left, or 11 minutes left - basically a lot of 1's. I usually don't take the route my GPS gives me, but today I did, and as I was turning onto the street I looked at the house to my left and noticed the house number was 111 - in huge numbers. I know this was a sign from him. There were too many coincidences for it to be ruled out!
I like your name, by the way. My boyfriend's nickname was bluebird, in fact I got two bluebirds tattooed to my side after he passed.
Grief is hard work. I hope you find some peace on this site.
Thank you for sharing, Pinkroses. I have had a few signs, or things that might be considered signs. Actually, they are things that would probably convince a lot of other people, and I do treasure them, but it is SOOOO important that I know for SURE that my love is ok, you know? So that I am afraid to fully trust any signs. I don't understand why I haven't been able/allowed/whatever to SEE him, even if briefly. He was agnostic, as am I, so he KNOWS how much I doubt. He also knows how much I love him, so he knows how much I need to know he is ok and that we will be together again. I've read in various places, including here, that grief can prevent such appearances, but that makes no sense to me -- why would God or the universe or whatever not allow those people MOST in need to see their loved ones??? People who have faith in an afterlife don't need that proof as much (not that they shouldn't get it or don't deserve it, just that they aren't so desperate).
Millie, I am sorry for your loss. It does sound like you feel, or felt, a lot like I do. As I mentioned to Pinkroses, I have had signs (I may go into them another time, but don't feel up to it right now), for which I am grateful, but it's just not enough. Oh, and my username here has to do with one of the signs, that's why I chose it.
A member of this forum, Bella, saw her husband,
I have no doubt we continue on in the afterlife after the death of the body.
Originally Posted by Bella
I've taken classes in mediumship at a Spiritualist church and have communicated with many different spirits. I described some of my experiences on my web site. I also have a web page on the evidence for the afterlife. Have no doubt that he still exists.
Last edited by anonymous; 01-04-2013 at 11:05 PM.
thank you for posting that, anonymous. I feel like my husband and/or God may feel like I'm expecting too much, and maybe I am, but I am wary of just seeing him in dreams. That is, I would love to see him in a dream if it were a true visitation dream, but even then I'm not sure I would be able to believe it. I so much want to see him for real, in front of me, though I know that is very rare.
I will have a look at your webpages you linked to; thank you.
But I do have doubt, I can't help it. I wish I didn't. I wish I had unassailable faith in an afterlife and in God, but I just don't.
Also: I wanted to add that I do have some psychic ability (runs in the family), though apparently much less than I thought because it isn't allowing me to see my love. And that is heartbreaking.
I too was agnostic, to put it mildly, but i won't go into all the details that made me a (skeptical) believer. Over the past 3 years or so, a couple of things happened that cannot be attributed to hallucination, grief, wishful thinking, etc.
My daughter's ex boyfriend died unexpectedly at the age of 29. He truly was like a son to us; we all loved him dearly, and still do. When he died I begged and pleaded with the universe to take me instead. I did "stupid and dangerous" things because I suppose I did not want to be here; I was angry, didn't like seeing people his age at the park playing the games he used to play. I was even angry when the daffodils emerged from the ground, telling me of the life cycle - all I could think was that daffodils were blooming, but he was dead and I'd never see him again.
He was "a proud atheist" (his words), with particular aversion to organized religions; no, he certainly did not believe in life after death, and all his friends felt exactly the same. One day someone was at his place (about a year after he died) doing some electrical work; in the home was another friend of his, and that was all; I was outside, talking with someone. Well, the electrician (who had met my daughter's boyfriend a couple of times) came running out of the house, followed by the friend. One of them was very pale, the other was having a tough time getting the words out. According to the electrician, as he started gathering his tools, he stood up and there was W--- walking down the hall. W's friend saw him too and started running to tell the electrician, ended up bumping into him, and out the door they ran (thinking back, it was rather funny!). After that, W'sfriend heard his voice a couple of times, one time telling him that nobody here on earth really knows what god truly is (his friend told me that the exact words were "if you only knew what god is really all about!".
Though I have not seen him in solid form, I have felt enormous energy at times, the energy "spoke" of him. It always happens when I least expect it; I think - but I could be wrong - that he does not appear to me because he knows I'd freak out! However, I received an actual text message from him, with the "secret" word I'd been asking for.
Your husband lives on, Bluebird; have you considered consulting an evidential medium? I am searching for one I feel I can trust because frankly I am very, very skeptical of mediums, psychics, etc.
I hope you will receive the "proof" you're looking for, Bluebird.
P.S. W's friend (and a few other former atheists friends of his) no longer are. Unfortunately they talk about all this amongst themselves.... I sometimes wonder, what's the deal? Do they have an image to uphold? lol