RudeAwakening

[RudeAwakening]

RA,
I will be like you if I ever get cancer like this. Mikey has told me that many people prolong their suffering by doing anything they can to live longer when their "time" is inevitable. Mikey says this "extra suffering" is not "needed." Mikey does say life is not necessarily about "suffering." I feel there is fear of the "unknown" with the patient and the family which makes them really push the treatments. And of course it is so hard to "let go" of the individual. But you are really never letting go because the loving connection is ALWAYS there and you WILL see them again! Mikey says if people only truly understood how glorious the "transition" can be, they would not do this to themselves. This is where society could also benefit from this knowledge. But it is a slow process. I do think they are doing more with "living wills" where you can address this while you are well. I know mine is very direct about no artificial means, etc. I am DNR/DNI now. When it is my time, I am leaving. (My disco and 70's party will be going constantly until you all arrive. RA, you are in charge of the pre-party!) Hope you are doing OK RA. Love and peace to you on this journey!
Carol and Mikey "in Spirit"

Hello you two. Mikey said "If people only understood how glorious the transition can be they would not do this to themselves." Those were the exact words my deceased mother spoke to the medium over a year ago. She said someone kept telling her to let go, it's ok (her husband) and her words were "why didn't I listen, why did I do that to myself." "I gotta stay here, I gotta stay here." She was worried about leaving me and husband for good reason. She was our only reason to live. We loved her more than we loved ourselves.

And Carol, are you sure you wane ME in charge of the pre-party. I was an alchy. In fact after taking my meds this afternoon I am enjoying a nice glass of Korbel extra dry as I write the forum. I'll do my best. There will be others to keep me in line. =)

[RudeAwakening]

You sound happy, RudeAwakening, as it seems you have no pain with these drugs. Of course, it does not matter if one gets addicted to them. I have now been reading that most doctors with cancer choose in home hospice rather than treatment with experimental drugs.

Well that's very telling indeed and certainly not a surprise. No clinical trials for those boys. I've heard nurses talk about how doctors discuss some breast cancer drugs around the big boy table. They would never administer these "life saving" drugs to themselves or their family, but they pump their patients full of them. That is so sick, so sick and appalling. "These are the drugs approved for this disease at a cost to the insurance company of 4K per month. "why aren't you giving them to your patient doctor?" "Is there anything we need to discuss about this"? "What beautiful children you have, your oldest is attending Harvard this year for the first time, you must be so pround. No need to thank me again for that letter of recommendation. I'm sure they would have over looked that minor incident with that high school freshman.

I can't come up with a reason not to do in home hospice for stage 4 cancer. Unless you're very wealthy and can afford the healthcare regime of the rich and or famous. If I were Bradd Pitt I would have everything at my disposal of course. Rich equals higher survival rate and when someone comes in and throws swayze or Steve Jobs in your face, the comparison is silly. The numbers aren't there. Yeah, I'd like to run down and have a nice CT scan and the medical community at my disposal but you can't beat hospice for what it has to offer.

Disclaimer is everyone has to evaluate their situation. There are undoubtedly hundreds of circumstances that warrant immediate and aggressive orthodox care. Once you hear the words stage 4 and systemic chemotherapy and aggressive therapy - well - Targeted therapies are showing fair results. Being one of the guinea pigs holds no appeal for me. My mother had huge tumors in her liver and lungs and they were more than willing to put her in a clinical trial that just would have killed her faster, put her through hell, but they would have learned something.

I am happy Bella, after a bad day yesterday (Ascitis) I'm going to refill my wine and marvel and be grateful for how lucky and blessed my life has been in so many ways. The hell I've survived in other ways can't make a dent in the protection and care I've received from spirit and others. I only wish all could know it. Just so sad so much pain in the world.

[Bella]

Thank you RA, for keeping letting us know that you are doing well. We are all rooting for you. I am glad today was a better day than yesterday. When I went to the first medium, one month after my husband's passing, I got a number of validations, but I wanted to know that my husband's lungs were clear and worried that he missed food too much, so I would constantly ask him about these things. About a month later, my EMDR therapist recommended a church-affiliated medium (she was the one that charged very little and saw few people for readings). The first thing she told me was that my husband wanted to tell me that his lungs were clear, that he felt good, and that he wished the other medium had made that clear. The second thing she said was "I don't know why he is showing me food - an ice cream sundae." That answered both my questions, so I'm sure the korbel (our favorite sparkling wine) will be there as well. I'm so glad you are enjoying it, RA.

[mokandi]

RA
Perhaps letting go is letting in.
Brave soul that you are. Intelligent most definitely. You give us peace.

[RudeAwakening]

That's a whole lotta Donna Summer to go around. But It's all good, along with some Blondie too.

Once that party is over, we be going to have an 80s party. We gonna play some Billy Joel, Billy Idol, VH, Whitesnake, The Cars, Journey, Michael Jackson, and a whole lot more. No cancer around, just some good suds and good tunes and no cats - the way Heaven should be.

70's and 80's music was the best. I'd have to vote 80's best music decade but those are just my tastes. No cancer and I'll leave my beautiful blue eyed half breed siamese at home, they'd prefer it that way and we have to have more than just suds to drink. Some lovely Tattinger or delicious over priced red wine for those of us that have aquired such tastes.

[RudeAwakening]

RA
Perhaps letting go is letting in.
Brave soul that you are. Intelligent most definitely. You give us peace.

Thank You so much Mokandi, what a wonderful thing to say. I can think of nothing more spiritually fulfilling and heart warming than to bring peace to another.

[RudeAwakening]

Thank you RA, for keeping letting us know that you are doing well. We are all rooting for you. I am glad today was a better day than yesterday. When I went to the first medium, one month after my husband's passing, I got a number of validations, but I wanted to know that my husband's lungs were clear and worried that he missed food too much, so I would constantly ask him about these things. About a month later, my EMDR therapist recommended a church-affiliated medium (she was the one that charged very little and saw few people for readings). The first thing she told me was that my husband wanted to tell me that his lungs were clear, that he felt good, and that he wished the other medium had made that clear. The second thing she said was "I don't know why he is showing me food - an ice cream sundae." That answered both my questions, so I'm sure the korbel (our favorite sparkling wine) will be there as well. I'm so glad you are enjoying it, RA.

The first medium I went to was remarkable. We were clearly led right to her. When I read a review on her by another medium I knew this young girl was who I wanted to see first and the most in NY. I could have saved myself a lot of money not flying all the way back to Lily Dale New York to see these three I scheduled with, but this first time I wanted to be as certain as circumstances could allow. It was my mother after all and strong validation here also provides strong proof of the after life period. A bad first time can leave a bad impression.

IT was the best experience of my life. Validating my mother and her family as easy as picking up the telephone was oddly what I absolutely expected to do, but not till I came to this forum did I realize just how hard it was to receive results like that. It helps to be open and prepared. Both that side and myself prepared for it like we were prepaing for college finals. I am somewhat intuitive myself and that must help a bit. Possibly the more effort made by those folks, that have so much trouble getting a reading, might help them. That I don't know for sure. Perhaps their party is unavailable and they should seek out all they know who have passed. Some even make the mistake of ignoring someone because they were so set on someone else and only they will do.

Ah the one sequence, 11:11 bed time. It's been a constant all week. Was sitting here sleeping in the recliner the other night when the rain in Vegas went berzerk only to wake me at exactly 11:11 when I immediately glanced at the clock. Spirit likes what's hapening here too and of course I'm bargaining for another 6 months to continue online and with family and friends with the spiritual input. Doubt I'll get it, don't think I have that much time left.

Take care all
RA

[Bella]

RA,
Thank you again. Your grace and wisdom have brought peace to so many of us. My wish for you is that you have all the time you need to be with family and friends.

[WWE LOVER]

70's and 80's music was the best. I'd have to vote 80's best music decade but those are just my tastes. No cancer and I'll leave my beautiful blue eyed half breed siamese at home, they'd prefer it that way and we have to have more than just suds to drink. Some lovely Tattinger or delicious over priced red wine for those of us that have aquired such tastes.

Thompson Twins, Culture Club, Simple Minds. Etc. It was all good.

[RudeAwakening]

RA,
Thank you again. Your grace and wisdom have brought peace to so many of us. My wish for you is that you have all the time you need to be with family and friends.

Thank you again Bella. I really had no Idea when I wrote it that it would help folks so much with those paralyzing loses we can do so little about. Grief demansds time, at 4 months out you are still so very raw, I can't even imagine or compare with my dearly loved mother. I wateched my aunt lose her husband a year before mom, he was 62. She let herself fall further and further year after year and nobody was going to stop her, she would not allow it. Her son runs her life now and we all know what comes out of her mouth means nothing. She will never do anything again. It's long past chronic greif and I've been forced to give up on her due to the interference of her controlling and miserable son and I have just had enough. Let yourself grieve and put one foot in front of the other every morning. Talk to him, imagine him with you everywhere you go, he probably is anyway. Join a group, or a club, there are no other choices.

If this is too personal don't answer, but did he ever say anything about you remarrying or anything like that? My mother had my stepfathers's wife picked out before she died. She knew he couldn't be alone, but women are different. Sounds like you've still got a way to go, give yourself a break.

As far as my family, and time, boy I do too - I"m curious about the other side and anxious to see my family that's passed but I'm no hurry to go right into fail mode 3 moths after diagnosis. Besides when else in you life will family treat you so good for so long?

RA