Hello need help with finding courage of spirit.

[GoodOmen]

Hello everyone! long time reader, first time poster. well how do i start? I lost my Friend in a car wreck years ago, ive been trying to open my self up to receive a message or sign from him. but I'm terrified. I really don't have any reason except for the fact I had a run in with a very unhappy shadow energy. to make it short this shadow energy PUSHED me and my friend out a door. we where not hurt, but pretty shook up. and ever since then i have been reluctant to try in earnest to accept signs or try to pray for communication from him. the only thing i Could do was sit down with my husband and meditate for a answer. I asked for my spirit guides name and " Bob ", came to both of us. I laughed at my husband, "Bob?" "I have a guide named ...Bob. wow. go figure."
then it dawned on me. Bob is what his family called him.... I knew him as " Robert." I want to talk to him more but, i get so scared that I'm going to run into trouble like last time, and inside i feel weak and defenseless against the unknown. how can i fortify my spirit energy. and put my faith and trust in Bob to be there? thank for your time to read this. the people that post on this forum are truly wonderful people. I can honestly say that i will feel welcome here sharing my faith and wonders.

[TheEscapist]

Welcome GoodOmen Have you tried speaking to him aloud when you're alone? I know that really helped me in being open to receiving signs from my friend Dave after he died. And I'm sure it also made it easier for him to communicate with me.

[Roberta Grimes]

A hearty welcome to our family, dear GoodOmen! You are wise to be careful with spirit communication until you feel more confident that you can control the energies around you, since if you are sufficiently susceptible to have had an encounter with a negative entity who was strong enough to affect you physically, then you are vulnerable. You will need to get beyond that. It is difficult to know what will work best for you without knowing you better, but here are some general thoughts:

1) Negative energies feed on fear. And fear is the opposite of love. So you must conquer your fear before you can do anything positive with spiritual energies! My hunch is that Bob is trying to help you do that - he is trying. Now you will need to do the rest.

2) Learn as much as you can about the greater reality that we inhabit. In my own case, I was terrified of the dark until I finally began to understand reality after decades of having studied the afterlife evidence. Now I can happily be in the dark all evening, and I no longer seem to fear anything. Please start reading! The study guide at funofdying.com is available for free, and is a place to begin - some of the threads and blog posts on this site should be helpful as well. As you come to better understand reality, you will feel more confident in confronting negative energies, since the more evil they are, the weaker they are. They cannot actually harm you unless you court them and let them in.

3) Give yourself to God. How and why you should be doing this would require a long post all by itself, but for now my suggestion is that you begin to live with an open prayerline. Envision the top of your head to be actually open to God, and send your thoughts to God all day long, whenever the thought of doing it occurs to you. I just send gratitude, and especially gratitude that God is giving me work to do and showing me how to do it, and is keeping safe all those I most love. The closer you are to God, the stronger you are going to be spiritually.

4) Surround yourself and those you love with white spiritual light. Think of a beam of light coming from the space just above and between your eyes - really concentrate on envisioning this light. See it moving and filling the whole room around you, and - if you have time - gradually fill your whole house with it. If you practice this ritual daily (I do it just before going to sleep), you will begin literally to feel the spiritual energy being generated and leaving your body through that spot between your eyes. White spiritual light is a perfect protection - no negative energy can get near it. But even if that were not true, just the ritual of producing this light will likely make you feel safer.

5) Consider beginning to do A Course in Miracles. The Course is a powerful antidote to fear. It will make you certain that "Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Therein lies the peace of God."

- My hunch from what you say is that you are a natural sensitive, which should make communication easy and happy for you once you have conquered these distracting fears. And when they are gone, they will be gone forever. Your life will be wonderfully so much richer!

[GoodOmen]

Thank you for your guidance. Escapist/Roberta. I have starting to speak aloud to Robert in my car, ( I feel less threatened in there for some reason) and the song Call me from Blondie came on just as i parked the car. his attempt to tell me he was there? I'm not certain, but i would like to think so. Roberta, starting tonight i will be taking the time to sit down and start my studies of the fun of dying. You see i have not handled death well at all. when it happened to Robert. i felt a gut wrenching sadness of loss. a Sadness that truly is strange for my upbeat nature. I try to always find the grass that grows after a rainy day. i swear my heart was torn to shreds and oh, it hurt. After his passing I became interested in the spirit and afterlife. and it has never stopped. I want to know, I HAD to know if Robert ever came to hang out with me. I cannot come to grips that hes truly gone. my gut says he is here. but my eye cannot see the signs...yet. well not clearly. I found this forum and i found others like me here! i love the exchange of Ideas and help that come from these wonderful posts! anything is possible through God. clearly the door is open. I shall start the journey to find him!

[Fasaga]

Wecome to the forum GoodOmen, you are in good hands with Roberta as you already know.

[Matty Mo]

Also welcoming you, Good Omen. Lots of great people, as you've probably already seen, on these boards. Glad to have you communicating with us now. Best of luck in your search for answers and possible communication with Robert.

Regarding your pushy shadow energy, I think Roberta hit it on the head. Any negative spirit seems to thrive on fear/sadness/depression/anger. If you learn to rise above these things the chances of a negative spirit doing anything to you seem to dissipate if not altogether cease. Welcome again to the "communication" portion of AL forums.

[jenniechan]

Welcome to Afterlife Forums. Feel free to share anything. Even thanks for sharing this stuff.

[ravensgate]

Welcome, GoodOmen. Similarly, I too am on a quest to connect with a loved one. I do not post much at all; I consider myself a "student", I'm a seeker, and I spend most of my time here reading... a lot.
Letely, odd things have been happening; one day I hope to be able to put some of these in writing and ask the great AL family to help me sort through it all.
Thank you for sharing :-)

[shantu]

Hi GoodOmen - I can understand your fears but perhaps it would help to think this way - would Robert ever let any harm come to you? No, of course not. When we are grieving, our fears and grief can put up barriers of emotion which make it difficult for our spirit friends to come near, so when thinking of Bob, focus on your gut feelings and let that bond of love between you expand to lighten your heart. Imagine that pure love filling all parts of you, mingling with the shadows until they too become Love. It may also help to write him a letter and pour it all out.

You said your gut says he is here but you have yet to see a sign... well, the eyes can be deceived, the ears can be deceived but deeper feelings... never. Speak to him in your mind and send him joy and love - he will answer as best he can. (btw, spirit people often need to learn how to communicate with us! )

[GoodOmen]

WOW. ok how cool is this? I believe that Robert has finally convinced me that hes trying on his part to reach me. lol it almost feels as if hes like come on girl I've thrown everything but the kitchen sink at you. just accept it!
last night i went to bed asking in my head for Robert to please try to make contact with me. i asked only for Robert. i told him i wasn't afraid. and i would not freak out. that night the song Whole heart got stuck in my dreams and i couldn't shake it all day. Finally i went to find the lyrics for the song (this was NOT one of my favorite songs at all) and i was TRULY surprised at what the lyrics said.

Life's ambition occupies my time
Priorities confuse the mind Happiness, one step behind
This inner peace, I've yet to find
Rivers flow into the sea Yet even the sea is not so full of me If I'm not blind why can't I see?
That a circle can't fit and where a square should be
there's a hole in my heart that can only be filled by you.... ect ect.

well if you ask me, I think that works. o.k. Robert i get it. Glad to know my sadness did not leave him earthbound.